The Hormones Linked to My X Chromosomes

I'll throw you all for a loop here:

Women Get Emotional

Sometimes, I'm not sure why I'm emotional. Today, my dog woke me up from a nap because I was bawling in my sleep. Ask me to recollect what my dream was? I have no idea, but I know the solution is ice cream.

On Sunday, I attended church. 

Now, if you know me, you know I don't practice religion. I have nothing against it, but that's a discussion for another time. I went to church for my nephew's christening, but something the pastor said struck a cord with me. He talked about leveraging resources. He made an analogy to a plant, where it draws resources back from the leaves when the roots are dry. When a human's roots are dry, they draw resources from relationships, their time, their own hobbies.

I've been really good at pretending certain resources are more valuable than others.

I've forfeited exercise for family. Even though I've told them I have an exercise class, and they schedule our time together around mine, I only have enough mental capacity to deal with socialization or physical exertion. So I've told myself family is more important, and then promptly napped through my exercise class.

I've forfeited baths for homework. That's right, some nights I choose to finish an assignment instead of showering. I've mastered the art of styling my hair to look less greasy.

I've forfeited time with my husband for a routine for the dogs. If he's spending a long day away from the house, I make a point to work early in the morning, and come home when he's not, so that the dogs aren't locked in a kennel for more than 8 hours. But this means I don't see my husband for the day, as I have to jet off again to class for the evening most nights.

I've forfeited rational thought for HORMONAL RAGE AND TEARS AND BLOOD

When I've depleted all my resources, my X chromosomes act up, and I forget why I'm sad, or angry, or both. I've stressed time and time again that I am not an average woman, but in this, I hope I am normal. If not, I might need some good old hormone therapy.

This is the NSFW Part

I've ruined so many pants. So many pairs of underwear. I've actually stopped throwing out ruined underwear and commit myself to endure the stains simply because my budget can't afford to replace them. The thing is, women have periods. Mine are more ghastly than some women I've spoken to, but regardless, periods can actually do something to us on a hormonal level.

But here's another thing: it doesn't just happen with periods. 

Women are sensitive, hormonal, and chocolate-craving demons even on their best non-period days. I know there's a lot of media out there that talks about how women can be just as dominating and in-control as their male counterparts, and they can be. However, let's not completely erase our knowledge of hysteria, here. It's not worth sterilizing women over, but female hormones do exist, and they do need to be acknowledged. 

Is it so wrong for me to blame my irrational outbursts on my hormones? Is it wrong for me to wake up crying from naps, and chalk it up to "being a woman"? That's what I am, and I can't deny it sometimes makes me feel like a crazy person. I think I'll continue to blame X chromosomes once in a while. It's a better excuse than "clinically insane".